skip to the main content area of this page


  Top 10 Reasons for Marrying Within Your Religion

Top 10 Reasons for Marrying Within Your Religion

12/31/2017 9:48:32 AM

In no particular Order:

10. Personalities Mesh Better
It is commonsense that people who have grown up in a similiar environment usually get along better. If you share the same culture, religion and family upbringing you will most likely get along better. Whether its Jewish Food, Holidays, or just a general outlook on the World, chances are there will be similiarities between the way you see and deal with things.

9. Religion is the same
Holidays will never cause an argument. The whole family will be completely on the same page when it comes to the religion of the children and their religious education. Holidays will be a time for family to get together rather than a time of conflict. A lot of couples seem to be agreeable that they will work out their religious differences prior to marriage, but it is after marriage when the reality of the differences come to a head and when the arguing starts.

8. The Children
A lot of couples before marriage only think of how they get along with their partner, however the reality is that there is more than the immediate couple involved. A family is about the couple and the children. Children need structure and can become easily confused when faced with conflicting traditions. Is it fair to cause this kind of confusion in children? Obviously not, children need a strong sense of identity and heritage. So before you decide to intermarry, consider the most vulnerable people involved, your future children.

7. Do You Want to Meet Your Soulmate
The Jewish religion believes that when you are born your soul is separated into two. One part goes to you and another to your soulmate. When you link up again during marriage your soul is again complete and you are again a full person. Based on a Jewish belief that we will get to shortly, it is clear that G-d wants you to marry within your religion. So it also very clear that your soulmate has to be someone within your religion. Someone who is Jewish just like you. A soulmate is someone who completes you in every way. So for instance if you are quiet, your soulmate may be a very good talker. The idea being that your soulmate completes you, he or she makes up for your differences and vice versa. Don't you want to marry your soulmate?

6. We are All One People and One Big Extended Family
We all originally come from the Patriarchs and Matriarchs. These were very righteous people who were the first ones to have a relationship with G-d. Before Abraham the first of the Patriarchs, people worshipped Idols, the sun the moon and anything else they could think of. Abraham was a bit of a revolutionary, he was the first one to see that there was only one G-d and in the process developed a relationship with G-d that reached a very high level.

The Amidah a very famous jewish prayer and some say an ancient form of meditation(see Aryeh Kaplan's book "Jewish Meditation") discusses the various sprititual levels. This is specifically in the line which states that G-d is King, Helper, Savior and Shield. In other words G-d is our King which also denotes a distance. I.E. a king rules, but is also distant from the king's subjects. The next level is helper, where by G-d helps us with our issues and our daily routines. Even closer is a savior. The savior saves you from imminent destruction when you are really in trouble. The closet level is a shield, where by G-d completely surrounds you and protects you from all harm. This was the level that Abraham achieved.

All of the tribes of Israel are descendant from the Patriarchs and Matriarchs and all of the Jewish people are descendant from the tribes of Israel. So you see we are not only one people, but also one big family. The future of our family depends on you. Lets leave no one behind.

5. Studies on Jewish Men
A study on Jewish Men, has come to a conclusion that in general Jewish Men are more family oriented than in some other cultures. According to the study Jewish Men tend to spend more time with their families than other cultures, where men tend to hang out with their friends. Think about that one ladies.

4. Same Culture
Whether its eating bagels on Sunday Morning, politics, sharing topics of conversation or love of Grand Ma's comfort food, this can be a big deal when it comes to living with someone.

3. The Torah G-d's guide to living
The Torah is the most important document in Judaism and the holiest of books. In it G-d clearly states what he thinks about intermarriage. In Deuteronomy 7:3-4 G-d states:

You shall not intermarry with them; you shall not give your daughter to his son, and you shall not take his daughter for your son, for he will cause your son to turn away from following Me and they will worship the gods of others.

This is when the children of Israel, our ancestors were entering the land of Israel and is an explicit warning from G-d that we should not intermarry. Like everything in the Torah it is meant to be a moral lesson for all time and for all places. It is clear that the same issue occurs today.

This is also a source for the Jewish belief in the law of matrilineal descent. Although it says son this has generally been interpreted to mean child in general. I.E. daughter and son. Also to clarify, in the Torah a person's grandson is sometimes referred to as their son. Here is the proof for matrilineal descent:

Since the verse states "for he (ie a non-Jewish father) will cause your son (ie grandchild) to turn away ... ", this implies that a child born to a Jewish mother is Jewish whereas, if a Jewish man marries a non-Jewish woman, the child is not Jewish.

Another possibility is that this is speaking about your son, the one who intermarried with a non-Jewish woman and the "he" is his non-Jewish father-in-law. By marrying out of the Jewish people, your son has been turned away from G-d, because his children will not be Jewish.

Either way this leads to the same conclusion. So for a Jewish Father that intermarries the Jewish line ends right then and there. After thousand of years of struggle in the face of sometimes rabid persecution, the Jewish Father has forsaken his people and his G-d. For a Jewish Mother that intermarries it is not much better as arguments will now result as to how to raise the child. I.E. what religion the child should be.

2. You May Awaken Spiritually
You may not be religious now, but during the course of your marriage this may awaken in you. Everyone of us has a personal and global mission here on earth. We are really all here for a reason. Our global mission is to make this world into a better place a process that involves bringing on the Messianic Era(see article on Jewish belief in the Messiah) In this era there will be world peace, a curing of all diseases, poverty will be no more and every person will know the ways of G-d. We also have a personal mission that we were put on Earth for.

Ultimatelly no matter who we are at some point there will probably be some type of awakening. We will want to be more involved with the religion of our Forefathers and Foremothers. So would it not be easier to do this with someone who is on the same page with us and will support us in our spiritual goals.

1. G-d Wants You To
This is the number one and the most important reason. In Jewish Scripture G-d is described as a parent and the Jewish People, including humanity in general as G-d's children. Like any good parent G-d loves you very much and wants the best for you. That is why he sent you down to this world, so that you would have the ability to progress spirituality and become a better person. No matter how far you distance yourself from him he waits for your return. G-d knows it is best for you to marry within your religion and since he thinks on a much higher level than any of us, don't you think it is time to follow his commandment. It is pretty clear that a successful marriage and life is dependent on inviting G-d into the relationship and following what G-d thinks is best.

Return to All Articles

Article pull quotes

If you want to find your soulmate.

Top 10 Reasons for Marrying Within Your Religion

G-d loves You and wants the best for you.

Top 10 Reasons for Marrying Within Your Religion